Ironic Advent Meditation #3: Advent Imposters

Ben Camino's Ironic Advent 2020 Meditation #3:      

Advent Imposters!

You must know, dear reader, how emphatically important this third ironic advent meditation  is, simply by the fact that it features the first ever exclamation point (aka exclamation mark, exclam, bang) in any Ben Camino title ever! Bang! 

Of course, Jesus talked about imposters of all kinds, so we should be up in arms, at least armed with punctuation marks exclaiming the bad news. And the worst imposters of all, he said, were imposter christs who would come in the last days. Now, I'm not entirely sure if we are in the last days or not, and I'm not sure if that guy dressed like a fox on CBN the other day offering eternal life in exchange for all your chickens* was, indeed, an imposter christ, but I am sure of one thing. 

The church of today like its good friend, contemporary culture, would almost certainly not have a traitor's chance in hell of identifying an imposter Christ or any other kind of imposter as far as that goes exclamation point, mark, exclam, bang, pow! 

Why so, you query? Yes, yes, you queried, I know you did. Don't pretend you didn't, you . . . fake. Alright, alright. Maybe some of us are too quick to see imposters. I may lean that way to balance the culture. As Don Quixote did. Goodness, what do they teach them in school these days. It's all in Aristotle. 

Back to your query, though. Why so? Why are we incapable and uninterested and unequipped and ineffective (whew, all those prefixes!)at the task to which Jesus set us oh so many centuries ago of being on the watch for imposters. Answer: we are often so sensitive and kind and soft-hearted (perhaps a good) and soft-brained (almost certainly an evil), we would spend all our time convincing these imposters that they merely are examples of the almost infinite number of persons these days apparently suffering from imposter syndrome. 

Instead of "get thee behind me!" with full stop exclams, we pour out run-on sentences full of sympathy, excuses, and commas, intended to help people see that they are just as good at being Christ as . . . Christ or just as good at anything else as anyone else, no matter how ill-equipped, unprepared, and inexperienced they are. 

You can't cancel me on Twitter. I don't Twit.  

Do me a favor, though. I won't put a link because it's too easy as it is. Just google imposter syndrome. Count up how many TED talks there are on the topic. Go to images and look at the thousands of venn diagrams and inspirational posters and flow charts and such. Fine, fine, fine. 

Don't get me wrong. I absolutely agree that there is such a thing as Imposter Syndrome. Just not THAT SUCH. But, like other things (syndromes, symptoms, nefarious practices, power dynamics) we have somewhat recently discovered/invented, they have become the trees for which we cannot now see the forest.

I promise not to use a Venn Diagram, mostly because I don't know how to make one and Ben Camino's ironic advent meditations are performed in real time, like baking, and I barely have time to edit (you noticed?) much less go to Venn Diagram school between now and ten minutes from now. 

So,I will explain instead. First, the very reason we have the concept of "imposters," is that SOME PEOPLE ARE IMPOSTERS. A LOT OF PEOPLE. Posers or not. You can be a poser imposter (that's nefarious). Or you can be a non-poser imposter. As my dear former brother-in-law used to always say sometimes: This is what we know. 

What do I mean? Well, you can be ill-equipped, unprepared, and inexperienced at something (your job, a relationship, savior of the world, a Shakespeare professor, what have you)and you can know this to be true while still passing yourself off as someone other than you are (you poser!). You, sir or madam, are the worst. Of course you can also just THINK or, more precisely, FEEL you are unqualified, in which case you really do suffer from imposter syndrome. False self-knowledge is real, and it's turn both ways.  

The other way is by being a non-poser imposter. You might lack self-knowledge (insert Socrates "know theyself" imperative here), you might not be so good at performing regular fearless personal inventories like they teach the folks to do in A.A., you might just have parents and/or people in authority over you who don't tell you the truth about yourself. Or ...  maybe your peeps just won't tell you that you aren't wearing any clothes, dear Emperor. 

Being a non-poser imposter sounds bad, of course, but it's not that bad. You can learn to listen to other smarter, more skillful people (and other people's parents), you can study people who really are excellent at what you thought you were qualified to do and even ask them for advice, you can learn to look at yourself more truthfully, you can work hard to prepare your previously unprepared self for the work you are already doing badly. The world is not a perfect place and we might need to have some folks doing work for which they are relatively unprepared. Just not bridge building. Or Shakespeare. Or saving the world. Let's face it. Mediocrity happens. But most folks can get better if they really want to. Especially if they realize they need to.  

So, yes, there are way too many  nefarious imposters. Pretend Messiahs. Or pretend anything else. But there are also folks who perhaps bumble into a situation and, unless it involves the nuclear button or taking away the sins of the world, it might still work out IF  such a one, finding himself/herself in such a situation, flexes the learning muscles instead of primping and posing as something he/she isn't. 

And . . . obviously, Advent, you ask? Yes, yes, the third day in fact. Beware of false Christs. False Messianic Kings. And even false cute things like Ricky Bobby's baby Jesus who are no more than a projection of Holiday cuteness and giggles rather than real Christmas comfort and joy. More on that in a sec. 

Imposters, though? Let's nail it down. Aristotle mapped them on his famous map of the mean like this.**

1. Qualified and knows it. Whether you are priveleged or not, has no value to the question at hand. Remember: bridges and dams are real.

2. Qualified and doesn't know it. Real imposter syndrome!!!! Pat these people on the back, pump them up, and pay them what they are worth, not what they think they are worth. Show them a Venn diagram, after they come to see themselves for what they are, let them give yet another TED talk.  

3. Unqualified and doesn't know it. These are the obtuse functional imposters. These folks might cause damage if, say, they are supposed to build an academic program, a bridge, a dam, or the stairway to heaven. Still, not knowing one is unqualified is not the same as being qualified. On the other hand, if good-hearted or open to wisdom and fortunate enough to be approached by those who aren't too nice to share their tough wisdom, this person can change, grow, learn, and either find a better fit elsewhere or start fitting better where they are). I thought I knew basketball until I had a really good coach.  

4. Unqualified and knows it but Fakes it. Such people are dangerous and bad, although since they are also almost certainly conniving and shrewd, they sometimes still might do some good. They won't know how to build a good bridge themselves, but they might get on the phone to cousin Leroy who can help. Alright, really that doesn't sound like a bridge I'd want to be on. Still these people are the true imposters. And they are rampant. And one should not be too nice to them. One should beware of them. And maybe try to talk them into being a #3b (seeking help). Or, sorry to get all biblical, maybe we can pray, like the psalmist, that they fall into the ditches that they dig. 

Advent (what? finally?! gee thanks Ben Camino!), of course, has an imposter double. It's called the Christmas season. More commonly, perhaps, Xmas. In the Xmas season, the twelve days of Christmas are counted backwards from December 25 rather than forwards towards Epiphany. And Xmas tends to stretch from the day after Halloween to New Year's Day. Then, after the football and the feasting and the Black Friday gift-giving, the tree is tossed and we each go hide in our rooms to play with our new techie toys. 

Or something like. 

The point is that there is a real Imposter Advent, the Xmas season as pushed by a tired, desperate, greedy non-community, the dying gasp of our lethal consumer culture. 

But that doesn't mean your neighbor, or you for that matter, dear reader, are necessarily Advent poser imposters. Your ignorance may not be criminal misprision. Sometimes it just . . . happens. You, perhaps, are just trying to please the kids, keep up with the neighbors, not feel too sad in all the loneliness, enjoy the lights like you did when you were a child (but it gets harder every year the louder and glitzier Xmas becomes). And we are tired, arent' we? 

There is a better way, a way of personal growth, but not a way of pretending. And I'm here to be the friend that will tell you about it rather than confirm you in your misery (no matter how cute those Grouch pjs are). The real Messiah, the not-fake stairway to heaven builder came as a poor child. "Advent" was on rough country roads, on a donkey, in the cold, moving in the elements. Decidedly not glitzy. 

Yet it did promise great presents and real presence. 

In fact he lived his entire life in poverty. Then faced terrible injustice and suffering at the hands of the culture of his day. And, in that, hiding somewhere, was the true gift.  

How is this a good story for me, you ask? How is this good for ME?! Thanks for asking. And don't get mad at the answer.  

It isn't. For you, I mean. I know this is not what your preacher says and not what your parents taught you either. But it's not for you. It's for us. You will know the true Christ, the true Christmas, the true Advent, by its us-ness. And, as far as you (or I) are concerned, since we have a hard time focusing on such things, it's best to just say real Christmas is about "thou-ness" (see Martin Buber). Short version -- it's for that person over there. And that donkey. And those folks who have never even heard the story but sure could use some grace.  

It will be difficult this year, especially. this year of isolation. But find the us in Christmus (I'm really sorry about that one). Find the old man ringing the bell outside in the cold. Or the pandemic equivalent of him and his bell. Out of love for us, don't go shopping in a crowded store for the perfect gift you just realized is perfect because it flashed across your computer screen earlier today. 

Do something special instead, something so traditional that it seems new-fangled in an increasingly fake and poser culture. 

Buy a donkey for someone. Ask me and I'll tell you how to get one and make sure it gets to someone who needs it. Or find the equivalent. And no, I don't mean posting a picture of donkey on Tweeter.  

Shovel the elderly neighbor's sidewalk; yes, you can use that fancy snowblower you got on Christmas morning. Come to think of it, why don't you do it all winter. No, I don't mean mine. I can handle mine (I live in Texas). 

Real Christmas is really good, but it costs something. Precisely, being real. Finding a way to be human rather than yet another Xmas drone.   

Alright? Buy the donkey. Use that snowblower. Find the old guy with the bell. And beware the guy in the outfit who wants all your chickens. And by all means, light a good old-fashioned candle. Follow the poor family on your Advent Calendar, on their lonely, precarious journey. Enjoy the light of the world, the light of us. Weep for our isolation.   

When He comes, He comes for us. And he will say unto us, "you are real. Come into my real Christmas kingdom." 

OK? Let's go!! eXclam.

* I made this up

** There's no such thing